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craterface · Poopypants

So I was always a hater towards smartphones and tablets. I have internet at home and at work. When I'm on the road (like on my way between the two) I don't need internet. I can live without it for that 40 minute. I'm just looking out of my head and listen some music. Also I can control the volume, skip tracks from within my pocket and it's easy and more comfortable if I use the fucking BUTTONS. While having a touch screen shit, you have to get it OUT of your pocket, unlock the device ond only THEN can you make anything. I don't find a touchscreen useful at all, the whole idea is a failure and although there are a few ways that it can prove useful, nobody implemented any of that so far.
Using a touch screen is more tiresome, you don't get the sense in your fingers when you pushed something and despite what most people says, it's harder to use it, and easy to misclick. It might seem to be a good gimmick, but clearly not suitable to control anything.
Especially games. And especially the ones that they make on these devices, it's like they intentionally want to create the worst controls imaginable. How the fuck can anyone play an FPS on this shit? Yeah, it's 3D but the controls are even worse than using a gamepad. Why not make an RTS, or some point & click adventures, RPG's that might be suitable for a touchpad? Nope. They always forcing TPS, FPS, H&S or racing games but those sucks on every platform.
And the games are the most generic ones I've ever seen in my life. It's like chinese ripoffs, even the name is almost the same, like Modern Combat and some shit. There's an Assassin's Creed ripoff too what a surprise. Another one, where you are in a western themed area then suddenly demons pop up from the floor WTF? The story (if it has any) is like Rambo sumed up by a 5 year old. And when I see these on youtube, or reading a review they get praises all the time, but how? Does anyone have a kind of comparing ability among those narrow minded fools writing and using these?
I have nothing against gaming on the go but seriously why do they pretend that anyone can play a tablet like a pc? Why not making games that are suitable for a device like that. No, and that's why the games are stupid too. You can only do so little, some game even tell you when to attack as everything is so scripted, they even tell you where to go, what to operate. I thought pc games are tending to be like this, but here it's even worse.
Then one of my colleague showed me his tablet with the tegra3 chipset that can produce impressive 3D graphics, and all I've seen is shitty games all over. There's even a Dead Space game on it and it sucks even more than the normal one.

How could this technology get into existence? The games don't justify it's existence that's for sure, so how come that they are here?
You know I'm an avid gameboy fan. The Game Boy Micro is ultimately the best handheld console in the face of the earth. It's super portable, smaller than a mobile phone and does not consume much power so it actually lasts long not like the stupid smartphones that you have to charge EACH AND EVERY FUCKING DAY.How is that even qualify as portable or mobile at all? If you're going to camp forthe weekend, better bring some extra batteries or say goodbye to your shitty device. But not with a normal phone or the GBM. With comfortable simple buttons and great game design, I can do so much more and better. And most importantly the games are awesome, nobody makes great and complex tactical titles, engrossing RPG-s lasting for 50 hour or super fun 2D platformers on a fucking tablet because that cannot be made on a shit like that. Not like FPS can be done, the evidence is there, the ones existing are not just not even controllable, they would be miserable on any platform. The truth is that a tablet is not suitable for anything, and that is exactly the opposite of the lie they trying to feed you.

There's only one use that I can see for these gadgets, and that is DRAWING. But that can only be done with a somewhat decent pressure sensitivity which is nonexistent yet (excluding some expensive and definetly not mobile wacom products). But I don't think they make this happen. It would not sell well and it would need actual skill which currently available progra- og sorry, APPS, don't require at all.

I guess this, and the games on it proves that the target audience are clearly faggots.

zachofat · A Winner is me!

So why did you waste time to type all that? We know mobile gaming (phones, mostly) sucks, no one gives a shit.

cBox · Tard

zachofat · A Winner is me!

Says the guy who wrote a longer review of DS3 that sucked balls.

berzerker · A Winner is me!

I for one quite liked the rant and thought that it was fun to read.

Generically I too hate touch interfaces: they are imprecise, cumbersome, clumsy and whatnot, but perfectly fit the trend we have seen in gaming over the last 20 years: to be tailored to larger audiences, they had to become dumber. From 101 keys to 10 or so on a controller to even less on the Wii controller to 1 on an iphone and none at all for Kinect, from offering a challenge to offering hints, glowing objects that show you stuff to use, big arrow signs that show you where to go, etc. I needs to be consumable quickly and playable instantly, this all even more so on handhelds, and particularly the ones that are not specifically designed for gaming.

berzerker · A Winner is me!

zachofat · A Winner is me!

My point is is that I'm fucking retarded.