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Star Wars: Republic Commando
Posted on Monday, March 14 @ 19:52:00 EST by Suislide
FPS reviewsOh yes another star wars game! And this time a first person shooter instead of an rpg. Maybe it could be kick ass like the Jedi Knight series. Ok im not going to lie.. this game is mostly a piece of shit.

Graphics: The graphics in this game look ok at first but the farther you get in the game you realize how much they suck huge amounts of cum. Especially the animations... its like watching a retard trying to dance... it just doesnt work. Who the fuck cares though because dancing is stupid as hell. The textures on a lot of things look like low res pieces of shit although you will get an average looking texture every now and then. The level design it self fucking sucks. The enviornments make me want to vomit they are so fucking terrible. If you just see some screen shots you can understand how incredibly terrible they are. The only good part of the graphics is the character models which arent half bad but with the shitty fucking animations it was like taking a nice cat and stabbing in the fucking eyeballs.


Sound: The sound in this game is plain and simply garbage. The voice acting is so fucking terrible its nearly impossible to explain. They take the dumbest lines possible and mix them into this stupid game. They stuff along the lines like LETS KICK SOME ALEIN BUTT. Next thing you know they are going to be saying things like "SUPER DUPER TEAM, THAT WAS ONE GNARLY SHOT" or "THAT WAS SO GOOD I WANT TO SUCK YOUR BROWN EYE." Also the lasers for the god damn guns dont sound anything like any of the weapons in the star wars i have seen which is bullshit. The sound director was probably too busy getting a fucking cleavland steamer in his mouth to realize what garbage this audio is.


Gameplay: The game is short as hell, repetitive, linear, boring, and the god damn guns suck complete ass. First off there is only three levels so you can beat this game is shorter than the shortest dick that one could possibly have. Also the weapons are all fucking terrible and everything takes too many god damn hits. OH YEAH 300 FUCKING LASER SHOTS TO KILL A AVERAGE SIZED ROBOT. Also you do the same god damn thing every level. GO HERE AND KILL THE STUFF KAY! YOUR ARE DONE! The gameplay here is complete shit and basically is about as fucking as trying to force your own testicles up your anus. Atleast you can control your squad to do certain things somewhat other than that BORING.


Story: There is none, you are basically sent in to do shit and then after you do it... you go to the next mission... OH theres only three so you beat the game after that.

The combat is barely decent, weapons and levels suck fat black dick, and the squad control is decent... this game is hardly worth 50 dollars considering it has 4 hours of gameplay 6/10

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Average Score: 2.55
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Re: Star Wars: Republic Commando (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Monday, March 14 @ 20:57:49 EST
Yeah anoother stupid ass Star Wars game they pump these things out like every two weeks. Did somebody just clash Master chief and the power rangers together? I hope somebody gets sued over copy rights and the voice acting is fucking terrible i've heard better taunts from an 8 year old. Whats with the lack of fucking ememies there's about 10 or 11 theres more in Doom95 than this peice of shit. Only two weapons in the game is week and the pistol looking thing is obviosly copied from Robocop. 6/10 ...try 3/10.


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Re: Star Wars: Republic Commando (Score: 1)
by Grumpy_Boy on Tuesday, March 15 @ 00:48:22 EST
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lol this review was worth it just hear tha wonderfull line "like a retard tyring to dance " , but sigh this game has been on my computer for a couple of weeks and I still havent played it, shall i bother?


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Re: Star Wars: Republic Commando (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, March 15 @ 12:03:39 EST
Holy craps I wuz about 2 buy this game when i came across this review - now I dunno if I should still buy it (when pruices go down) or copy someone else's CDs :D

Thx 4 the review anyways - good 2 see the other side of the coin

Your reviews crack me up -
Added vgs to my favorites ^^



One question though - of all the reviews I read, yours is the only one that actually throws that many jabs @ the game
All the other reviews - yup, not jus' gayspot but ALL of them (must be at least 7 or 8 independent reviews all in all) gave it top marks and hailed it as a masterpiece (although they all do admit that the single player part is short).
So the question is: how d'you explain that (other than the fact that your site ownz all them others :D)?
D'you think Lucasarts would have paid all the other reviewers? ALL of them???


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Re: Star Wars: Republic Commando (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Wednesday, March 16 @ 01:47:37 EST
Author is trying too hard to be funny, which is worse than boring.


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Re: Star Wars: Republic Commando (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, April 12 @ 10:24:36 EDT
6 out of 10 ? u kidding
its 3 at best
I played demo and yes, you are fair to this game - its shallow and looks vary from utter shite to mediocre



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Re: Star Wars: Republic Commando (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, May 03 @ 23:49:06 EDT
Ya I like that video they have in the EXTRAS that shows that old guy instructing the programmers on how to enter and clear rooms...its to bad the stupid fucks didn't bother actually listening to what he said. Instead of being a cool tactical game of storming some stupid alien fuck's base its just more gay ass shit where your guys stand around in the open shooting, and missing, at enemies 2 feet in front of them.


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