We all know that whatever i say is more important and has more authority than any other bullshit biased queer review site out there. Thats why the VGS awards are among the most prestigous and best awards one could recieve. No one wants to read what the fuck gayspy or gamespot wants to say and im always right about this so here is the awards.
Game of The Year 2004:
Half-Life 2
Everyone and their fucking mother knows that this is the best game that has ever been made and if you disagree you are obviously a piece of shit. There is incredibly realistic graphics compared to any other game out there with the best fucking kick ass action anyone could possibly imagine. The speech and sounds, graphics, gameplay and fucking everything about it kick the shit out of my ass. Gamespy apparently gave it to Halo 2 which doesnt have much going for it. They even gave the fucking best multiplayer to UT2K4 and that was supposed to be Halo 2's best part. SO HOW THE FUCK DID IT WIN? Money... Half-Life 2 on the other hand has kick ass action flying around on a fan boat shoot tanks, combine and helicopters out of the sky and running over tons of combine and have them fucking flying all around. Then you can beat the shit out zombies with a crowbar and best of all THE GRAVITY GUN. This gun has created many joys in my life. You can shoot a fucking saw blade a zombie cut it in half then pick up a table and smash someone in the face then use the debris from it to kill something else. Half-Life 2 owns all.
Action Game of the Year:
Half-Life 2
Who the hell didn't see this one coming? Well all of you didn't because you are abunch of faggots. This game deserves the awards for ever categorey even racing which could be put as the fanboat or jeep squence. This game has so many kick ass moments and is such a good game that if i were to die i would donate my heart to replace gabe newell's heart which is colged with huge amounts of food. Just everything in this game is so perfect. The AI is better than every other game even though people will say it sucks. You are so full of fucking shit.. i keep fucking asking which game has better AI and i never get an answer from those fucks. WHY? Because this has the best AI. If you say Far Cry you are obviously a moron. Half-Life 2 is the best
Adventure Game of the Year:
Sherlock Holmes: The case of Silver Earring
The only adventure games that came out this year besides this are the huge pieces of shit the adventure company craps out like water and Midnight Nowhere. Considering that Midnight Nowhere wasn't the greatest adventure i gave it to Sherlock Holmes. This adventure game was pretty good BUT NOTHING ELSE FUCKING CAME OUT so it sort of won by default. SO RELEASE SOME GOOD FUCKING ADVENTURE GAMES LUCAS ARTS. Sam and Max cancelling pieces of shit
Racing Game of the Year
Flatout
This is the first racing game that wasn't a boring pieceo of shit that makes me want to take a nap. Why? Because this game has Havok physics and they made damn good use of it. I love smashing the shit out of my car and other shit all scattered around. Need for HunkofShitBuyMeEASUCKS 2 doesn't even have a damage system. HOW LAME. OH look i smashed into a brick wall at 150 and my ricer is prefectly fine. Not in this fucing game! You fly into a wall your driver fucking flies out and dies! The races arent boring! Also it has cool extras like shooting the guy out of the car and trying to see how high you can get him. This is the first racing game not to suck.
FPS Game of the Year
Painkiller
Well we all know Half-Life 2 is an incredibly way better game but hell painkiller does kick some good ass. Serious Sam 2 is away being developed so we got Painkiller. You blast the shit out of hordes of demons with large and odd weapons. DAMN RIGHT thats the way i fucking like it. I want to bust in somewhere and blow the shit out of 200 guys then have some chick bust in naked and give me a blow job then i shoot a stake in her. This game has the stake gun which blows through enemies and sends them flying into walls or other objects. This is another great gun that came to use besides the gravity gun. Painkiller kicks some serious ass.
Role-Playing Game of the Year
Worlds of Warcraft
Most of the rpgs that came out this year have been incredible hunks of shit *COUGH* EVERQUEST 2 *COUGH* Also i know you have to pay a monthly fee which sucks a dick off a dirty camel but its just so good. Vampire Bloodlines could have been good if it wasnt an ugly ass bug ridden piece of shit. This game on the other hand kicks the ass of all the other rpgs and then shits on the fucking box and ships it back to the developer.
Strategy Game of the Year
Rome: Total War
Creating Huge armies and cities and beating the shit out of other places with thousands of people on screen? FUCK YEAH Even though this game has bugs you can create huge fucking armies then go attack and crumble a city and conquer the world bitch. Ill use this to strategise when i become president. This game has somewhat of a learning curve to it but who cares! You are a fucking dumbass if you can't figure out how to play this game! Best fucking RTS. If you disagree you are obviously a retard.
Multiplayer Game of the Year
Unreal Tournament 2004
I didn't have this categorey last year but who fucking cares? Oh maybe that guy on the caltrops forum who seems to bitch about everything I write and acts like he has a superior intellect because he cant fucking figure out nothing on this site is to be taken seriously. What a fucking moron. Anyways this is the best mutlipayer game all year. Tons of modes of play from the ass kicking of on-slaught where i fly around with vehicles and own you in every single way because i am better than you to the coop fighting off lame low poly aliens from Unreal 1. Theres ATLEAST 100 maps and its tons of fucking fun. This is the best fucking mutliplayer game ever made.
Shit-Stained Game of the Year
Kuma/War
What an incredible piece of shit this game is. Everyone knows it was only released so a terrible ass company could try and make some money off a controversial game. Why the fuck is there a slash between Kuma and War? Does it make it cooler or a better game some how? What the fuck. The graphics in this game look like they could be on a broken Sega Saturn and the gameplay is about the same. Did you know in this game that if you were to glue your penis to the keyboard you could win? That is why this hunk of shit is the shit-stained game of the year
