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Painkiller: Project Overdose/FEAR: Perseus Mandate
Posted on Thursday, January 24 @ 15:23:07 EST by Suislide
FPS reviewsWell you good folks who read this are wondering, now why in the fuck is this crazy man writing the same review for two games? I'll tell you why...because both of these shit box deluxes suffer from the same damn problem. They are LOW-BUDGET, AWFUL, CUM-STAINED stand-alone expansions to games that were actually good. Someone wanted to make some quick cash because thats what these shit-heads do so they sold the copyrights to two successful games to some low-budget cock sucking developer, and what do we have now? A cum-blasted version of the first game.

Graphics: Ok so remember back in the wee days of 2004 and 2005 when F.E.A.R. and Painkiller came out? They were pretty damn good looking games in their hay-day. But somehow the people who developed these games managed to make both fear and painkiller WORSE than the original game itself. Both of them suffer from piss poor level design that is blatantly complete shit injected into your eyeballs right at the beginning. In Overdose you start in some boxy looking ancient greek-themed area with low res textures...and travel from box to box...no one thought about using anything round. Then in FEAR you start off in the fucking sewer and just go through random ugly ass gray sewer stuff until you realize you are a piece of shit for buying this game, hang yourself, and then leave a suicide-note that says nothing but "Fear: Perseus Mandate" Both of these games have god awful low-res textures slapped on poorly designed models. Seriously some of the monsters in Overdose are fucking balls of flame....wow a lot of thought was put into that one. Perseus Mandate just all the models and pretty much everything looks like a gray blob of shit. Half the guns in overdose are just reskins of the same exact weapons. Like the shotgun...is now a bone gun that shoots bone shards. ITS FUCKING AWFUL. Overall, The graphics in these games is worse than a Will Smith movie.


Sound: So the voice acting is as you expected it to be...the worst pile of shit I have ever heard in my entire life. The guy who does Spike's voice from Cowboy Bebop should fucking stick to anime because its an embarrassment to be in this game. It's like shit-stain on his career. The dialog is just painfully bad in painkiller...they need to rename it Painbringer. It fucking brings pain to my ears hearing this pile of shit on my computer. All the sound in both games is basically just shit. The music, dialog, ambient noises are all just complete shit except for the ones that are just re-hashed from the original game. Which is just plain pathetic...if you are going to make a stand-alone game, use your own damn sounds. Point is the sound in these games will make you want to cut your dick off and throw it in a lake.


Gameplay: Now I remember both Painkiller and FEAR being pretty damn fun. In fact, I played through both of them before these and they are still infact pretty damn fun games. However, once you boot up these pieces of shit, its like someone fucking power-farted diarrhea into your brain. Seriously, the AI in both of these games is fucking WORSE then the original AI...how the hell did you make it worse? Are you fucking retarded? Then the guns in Overdose are just complete ass, they all have the same idea as the original weapons but they changed them all just to make them all fucking stupid. No inspiration, thought, or design was put into any of this shit. The combat in Perseus Mandate is just lame as you are fucking weak as a kitty for some reason so you take two hits and your are dead. Who cares though because the AI is so fucking bad now you can just walk right up to them, slow down time, and then fucking uninstall the game from your hard drive. Seriously, the combat in both of these games now is just lame stale shit. The enemies in Overdose are just shit, from some AWFUL looking dogs, to some retarded skeletons and zombies. Seriously the gameplay in both of these games is a shit-stained shadow of the former games.


Story: Ok so the story in Overdose is you are some demon son or someone and you are rebelling. Basically just all around fucking garbage. Then in FEAR, you are some guy who is going to investigate some other bullshit that is supposed to be parallel to the original story. Once again...basic fucking garbage. The writers for these stories spent about 20 minutes total thinking of the stories, 5 minutes actually writing, then 15 minutes jerking off on each others faces.

God awful low-budget shit 1/10

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Re: Painkiller: Project Overdose/FEAR: Perseus Mandate (Score: 1)
by captnPugwash_halabalobale on Thursday, January 24 @ 20:04:13 EST
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xlnt rvieu, keep it cummin...


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Re: Painkiller: Project Overdose/FEAR: Perseus Mandate (Score: 1)
by Derinzz on Wednesday, March 18 @ 20:35:23 EDT
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Painbringer..

When I saw that and the "Power-farted Diarrhoea" part, I tensed up and nearly had a heart attack from laughing..


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