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| The Matrix: Path Of Neo | | Posted on Friday, November 25 @ 22:35:01 EST by Suislide |  Fuckinghateyou writes "Oh please help me I fucking swear if this game doesn't suck donkey dick then forever I shall keep thy Silence.
Graphics: Okay, One, WTF is with the god damn Shiney ness of Evey fucking one? Everything is shiney as hell, everything... Thats fine and dandy, but when Neo turns his head, his neck looks like a fucking 70 year old Vagina... On apart from that, the Game Makers were to fucking lazy to Animate the movies, who cares? Well I care because the movies were dark as shit, and you had to turn your damn Volume up to hear them... Load of shit.
Sounds: This is where I shot myself in the head. The Gun sounds are okay, half decent untill you go into Focus, then it sounds like a damn Slot Machine spitting out fucking Quarters... Apart from that, Neo still sounds like a fag, Smith still talks like he has been molested by Micheal Jackson at a young age.
Game Play: Lord save my soul from this damn game... Neo runs like he just got ass raped by a fucking donkey, need I say more. You have a Veriety of missions... All of which include fighting. I thought it was a good Idea with the first mission though, Fight wave threw wave of enemy to unlock what level of game play you want to play on, but heres the thing, A Retard could of got the Hardest Difficulty. Plain and Simply, its to fucking easy. You can upgrade Neo though, upgrades that basicly don't do shit for you. Wheres the Cheats? Oh here they are... Wait, you have to beat the fucking game on different difficulties to get them... WTH? I played threw this crappy game once, I don't need to do it 3 more times just to get cheats do I? What about cheat sites... Oh fucking no, no cheats, so for all you people who like to just play the game again to kick the shit out of someone in god mode, sorry, but you have to play it 4 fucking times to get all the cheats.
Story: For all you people who thought the story would be based off the movies, guess what, the movies within' the game, the actual ones, are jumbled up to confuse the fuck out off you so you didn't notice how the Game play veared off course from the Actual movies itself. Neo dreams about kicking the shit out of waves of enemies when he finally wakes up to find a gay ass message on his computer screen. So he gets his ass caught by Agents and has this damn bug planeted in his stomache... So people from the *cough* 'Real World' save your ass from being raped by Smith. Yadda yadda yadda, you go into Combat training which is a fucking Ninja kind of place... *Yawn* Then you go into a building that suddenly changes the original story, a wall blocks neo from the rest of the bitches and he has to make his way back. Countless running like a fag and kicking the shit out of Enemies and your finally back on Story. Then guess what you go off story once more into the sewers under the city. After another Repedative kicking the shit out of enemies you exit back on course. The rest is basicly on corse to the movie expect when you and smith face off, you'll find you fall threw a fucking hole in the ground to a glitched subway and you have to do some gay puzzles to get out. After that its all gold and shit.
Finally you are Neo... The one... But we're now on Intermission to the Second movie, okay now your flying over the city and you can chose which mission you want to do. Theres a couple gay ones... I take that back, all of them are gay. Once done you'll get sorta on story, kicking the hell out of three upgraded agents and then you do your flying act after beating some Swat members that wern't in the movie. Then you have to save Ship captains that were never in danger... Oh fucking save me... Well you finally get to the Frenchman, after kicking his guys asses and sword fucking them you go threw another thing that never happened. A fucking puzzle that pissed me the fuck off because it never happened and the story wen't to complete shit from there on end. Skipping onto when you must get out with the Key maker, you'll find that you do a bunch of shit that never happened in the movie once more... Oh please would you guys just close the page so I don't have to keep going?
Well now we're onto the Third movie... Good, almost done typeing this crap. Lets just skip the gayness and go to the less gay, the battle with Smith. This stays on track most of the time, go from ground to air, to building to air to... building? okay I don't remember him going into a second building but what ever. Then back to ground where you can finally kick the hell out of Smith. Well After you do that, the fuck nut brothers will inturupt you from killing smith and tell you about the New ending... Yeah guess what, I told my friend about the ending and he said and I qoute,'Watch the new ending will be a Giant smith or something.' and guess what... A bunch of smiths formed a Giant fucking robot made of Smiths... Well after countlessly beating the shit out of the er... smith-bot? You'll go into the Final Cutscene, and what do ya know, you still will have no fucking idea what happens to Neo...
I think my retarded cousin with Down syndrome could of shit on the key board and made a better game...
For making me sit threw 2 hours of gayness and 20 minutes of typing this, I give, The Matrix: Path of Neo, a Gay 2 out of 10...
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Votes: 18
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Re: The Matrix: Path Of Neo (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, October 01 @ 01:37:55 EDT | | Well here's the thing the game isn't obviously for you you don't have to act like a butt hurt bitch whiny ass brat 10 year old who should be in diapers over it. Yeah so what you think it sucks but what makes you so special than everyone else that you have to post this? Over all what do you expect it's a game some of it's not supposed to be based off the movie yeah you left your input but who do you think you are a god posting this? All I see is a rampaging child who needs to keep his mouth shut and seek anger management. |
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