Fuck yeah the first episode for Half-Life 2 and OH MAN does it kick ass. This game is DAMN WELL worth the money unlike that SiN Piece of shit. Gordon is back to kick ass, beat up old people, and have an orgy with 45 women making them all orgasm at the same time.
Graphics: The graphics are like a slightly updated version of Half-Life 2. The enviornments and levels are both bigger and more detailed. But the biggest graphical change is the use of HDR but an even bigger change is not fucking blinding me with HDR. Its the first game ever to not make HDR look like a retarded pile of shit. It makes the lighting just look amazing. I think i already cummed three or four times on your mother. The environments being larger and more detailed along with the use of the new lighting effects make the game look damn good. This is how to use the source engine unlike those fucking turd burglers who made Sin Episode 1. Also, as if you would already know, the gun runs incredibly fast. Fast like Niel Armstrong on cocaine or perhaps as fast as a black guy running from the police. The art direction kicks ass as you run the levels theres changes from the citadal thing to city 17. Basically the biggest change in graphics is the larger enviornments, more detail, and the big time improvement in lighting. The graphics make me hard.
Sound: The sound once again kicks testicles. After playing all these games with voice acting resembling that of a fly eating a dogs ass its nice to hear some good voice acting. The people actaully put effort into it and there is nicely written dialouge that you would actually consider listening too. The voices fit the characters as well. Not to much else to say that hasn't already been said in the original HL2 review due to this being similar to an expansion. There is new music that is more up beat then in the original game and is actually placed in the game quite well. Like when im fucking blowing people away the music is playing and sends me on a roid rage. We all know gordon does steroids.
Gameplay: FUCK YEAH. More ass kicking in the the half-life universe. Sending people flying with the gravity gun and shooting some bitches with a shotgun. Now there isn't any new weapons which sucks ass and only one new enemy which is the combie alien. It will sprint and you and blow it self up like a dirty muslim out in iraq but you can use them to your advantage. Now what kicks ass is the map design and the ass kicking you go through. You are constantly with alex beating peoples asses and there is so much ASS KICKING in this episode its utterly ridiculous. Theres you and alex fighting combine who are at the same time fighting off the retarded aliens which are probably just poor people but who cares. You also get a team of guys part of the game to kick ass with. There is basically just ass kicking going all around with you and alex, you and a team of people, and small sequences where you blow people away on your own. The hospital scene makes me think of Hard-Boiled with the mass amount of ass kicking. The end sequence is also so well done im going to blow a load right on alyx's face.
Story: The biggest part of this is the story is expanded like a mother fucker. It creates more mystery around the vortigaunts and the g-man and explains how the hell you got out of the citadal. Also everyone always interrupts when you are trying to score with alex. It also explains what those ethopian people were doing in the citadal. Basically you should buy this game or you are a fucking piece of shit.
Pure and utter sex 10/10
