Video Games Suck - Tony Hawk's American Wasteland

Guess what?! There's another Tony Hawk game out there! And this time they (Neversoft) completely lied about the game like my girlfriend lied about her crabs!

Graphics: Always the same in the past, only this time Neversoft wanted to make it more "artsy" and have a famous skateboarder artist (Jimbo Phillips) design some stuff for them. Come on, how fucking lazy do you have to be? Also, that famous graffiti dude that runs Obey tags it up, too. This game kind-of pissed me off with the new style simply because it just seemed cartoony. And if you have an XBOX 360, then you won't see that big a difference from the old XBOX. Just a bit smoother.

Audio: Ok, in past Tony games there was some alright music (THPS 3 was entirely good), but not this time. Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, and even Saves the Day enter with gayness. And what's up with half the songs just being about Los Angeles? Fucking queers...

Gameplay: The story sucks. LA is the dirtiest, filthiest place on earth next to New Jersey. I can't stand it when stories surround LA or even New York. Sure, I guess that's where skateboarding originated but to be technical, NOBODY FUCKING CARES! You start out with a bunch of different skaters to choose from and they all look like their mom chose their clothes for them simply because they have an extra chromosome. Let's see, there's an Asian, two white guys and a black dude. I feel the most sorry for the black dude, simply for the short-shorts. On another note, you cannot choose the tricks your skater does or the stance he skates with. GAY! Well, moving on. The main objective of the game is to collect monuments and other skatable items and bring them back to your "Skate Ranch." Yes, I know. REALLY lame. Other objectives include making money and buying stuff for your skater to make him look even more faggish. As you can see, the story mode really sucks ass and I would much rather kick a nail in the wall while bare-foot then to play story mode again. Although the BMXing is really cool and I'm glad they put it in.

Multiplayer: Multiplayer is better than ever. The highlight of this game. Not only is there Free Skate with your buddy at your site, but there is also Classic Mode co-op. Classic Mode also features old levels from the first Tony Hawk that many people cannot remember at all. I bought the "Collecter's Edition" of this game and it gave me two bonus levels never before seen. All I've got to say about this part of the review is that multiplayer is fucking fun.

The Lie: If you have ever seen the commercial, ad, whatever for this game, then you know what they promised about one huge, streaming level. SURPRISE!!! There is no such fucking thing! To explain how they raped the gamers who were really looking forward to this is simple. When you start out in Hollywood for the first level, it's all one level. You're still trapped in the typical Tony Hawk "box" that they've always put you through. But, to get to Beverly Hills, one must skate through a tunnel looking thing to get there. "WTF? A tunnel?!" Is what you're probably thinking. Yes, a tunnel. And while you're skating through Satan's anus, the game is loading your next destination. So when you look at the cover of this game, do not be fooled by "Free-Roaming" and think it's gonna be like GTA. It's just Free-Streaming in-between levels.Plus, you can only stream in Story Mode (Which, once again, I hate).

I give this lie, I mean game a 4 out of 5.
(I would of given it a 5, but the damn lie was too disappointing).