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Unreal Championship 2 The Liandri Conflict
Date: Sunday, October 30 @ 09:18:39 EST Topic: [XBOX] Action Game Reviews
holy CRAPOLI, GOD I THINK I'VE JUST BEEN ATTACKED BY A TERRORIST BECAUSE THIS GAME BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWS MORE then our chemistry teacher with 3 jobs!!!(and geometry)(shes a nice person though)i just hope i came in time to save yo ass and sponduli(thats money retard)
GAMEPLAY: okay first the game tries to lure you in with "Bone crunching melee action". BULLSHIT is what they forgot to put in the last word in the sentence. even unreal tournament was better than this heap of mutilated hype of lezbain pussy. OH BUT THEY HAVE 40+ FRIGGI MAPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Another trap to lure you in, i dont know what u nerds call this shit, if eligable enough to be shit instead of decaying kitty litter, is world overconfident BOXY NON DESTRUCTIBLE bit mapping aliasing nerd turd whatever whatumacallit thingy. its all the same shit, point a to b, as long as the bases are parellel they'll buy it says the mr.pissbored level designer. Moving on to more peace of rotten shit, the guns, if even considered lethal is desperate attempt to encourage wielding dildos(melee) instead of ummmmm whats long and sexual hmmmmm shaqs penis yeah there we go(gunz). Then they have some more junk they threw in like the garbage modes like nali slaughter. dont even ask. kicking the dead horse is some more rotten cliche, the ADRENALINEEEE, which is short for having erection in a short period of time.NO its not its suppose to be a super power but its not any more stagnant than an occasional boner that your grandpa gets at a checkup in a physical test...yea u know that part where they yea.....okay leaving the bad memories to make more.... GUESS WHAT THERE ARE 14 DIFFERENT CHARACTERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND THEY ALL HAVE DIFFFFEREENT WEAPONS(say different slowly)MorE LIES!infact i should sew them for false information! there are 3 or 4 weapons kiddies,(melee)basically: duel swords, a staff, and a fist add a single sword. now there are 2-3 characters with this duel swords or whatever with DIFFERENT SKINS. there is nothing unique. duel swords hit fast while single is slow. get it? good!and if you havent figured that out i suggest psychotherapy. Weapons weapons weapons........only 8(as guns not melee)4 for each category; energy and explosive. flak cannon is useless so thats out,hmm lets see iney miney moe, which one of u guns have to go?grenade launcher! so there are basically 2 explosive guns u use(all the whores online use PROGRAMMABLE CHAINSAW SHOOTING GUNS THAT ACT AS A MINE!! and u guessed it the ultra whore rocker launcher! as for energy well it depends , if u want to be a cheapass pussy use shock rifle and bio.
SOUND: SOMEONE TURN THE DAMN BACKGROUND MUSIC OFF BEFORE I MAKE A SANDWICH OUT OF MY DICK WITH THE DISK CASE. WHO WANTS SOME EGYPTIAN music? Certainly not me!!! characters make lame comebacks like you look so guud in black but im not gonna tell u incase you decide to burrow them and use them at school and receive a good assbeating by somehopefully aware of youstealing the line from this pile of shit.
GRAPHICS: AHHH TRIBES2 ANY1? Never has any game be so nostalgic to me. its like deja vu all the time!weed is too cheap these days....oh shit its the egypian music again playing in my head. THIS GAME LOOKS LIKE A LEZBO IN A FETISH MAGAZINE LOADED WITH GASO I MEAN VASOLINE. What that means is its been POLISHED from the other 2 unreal games. this most be the brother with the down syndrome. the other 2 had slightly less mild case of absurdness.
STORY: i dont know how to explain this to u but ur egypian background and ur in space....soo your constantly cybering chicks in a pyramid while ur in your space ship..so i lied and you sprouted a boner.here is what i meant. u play some lameass of an attempt to piece together fragment of tyrannersorerirororusuueususuususuuss(echo)shit with vitamin-rich jews decomposing called ASCENSION RITES. YES "RITES" NOT RIGHTS!! I TOLD YOU GUYS THAT EVERYONE WILL SPEAK INTERNET LANGUAGE IN THE FUTURE BUT U GUYS LAUGHED AT ME!i finished it in 4 hours god i must've sucked cuz it was on novice too!
one time there was a company named EPIC games who blew an unreal game to an island called MIDWAY. MIDWAY WAZ LIKE"OH MY GOD THIS SHIT IS SOOO UNREAL SEND IT TO MAINLAND" and thats where it originated.
and thats only being merciful cuz fanboy might not have cookies and milk everyday to count on
0/10
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