Video Games Suck - Gunz Online

The Koreans design another MMO game that's got the masochist, child molester and animal rapist market pinned down perfectly. Oh, and it sucks, if you got any other sort of idea.

Gunz online is a 'unique' game - unique in that it excels in sucking in so many ways that it redefines the genre of "shit game" in a way that not even Valu-Soft could improve on. It's literally so terrible that I'm becoming glad that independant game development is more and more impossible by the month, if only to save us from peices of shit like this.

Graphics: The graphics are like this: The developer of the game must of stolen a bunch of tibetian children, then beaten them half to death with a crowbar before sticking them in front of a 386 with a screen that randomly turns itself on and off which has a beta version of MSPaint, and then dumping a full-face motorcycle helmet with a opaque visor on the kids' head - WHICH IS FILLED WITH BEES. The graphics look pre-wolfenstein 3D - hell, pre-asteroids even. It's like this game fell out of the ugly tree, hit every branch on the way down, then fell into a bucket of ugly soup.

Sound: The sound in Gunz, like the rest of the game, is total shit. The guns themselves sound like they recorded the sounds of cracking popcorn then removed all the bass from it, and I think the music was comprised by taking samples from atari games and then combining them with the sounds of screaming six-year old thaiwanese girls.

Gameplay: Like nearly every other modern shooting game, the whole game purely revolves around luck with no elements of skill whatsoever. And when you're selecting a gun, you'd best choose SMGs or you can expect to spend the next 15 years trying to kill someone with 1 health and failing.

While most luck-based games are known to be shitty, Gunz Online is notably shitty, not helped by it's other problems.

For example, the netcode is so fucking terrible that it's hard to explain it in words. I have NEVER seen such a bad netcode in my life, and it's even worse because this peice of shit game is multiplayer only.

For some reason, they decided to make the game work clientside, meaning that if someone's lagged, you'll sure as hell know about it when they're clipping through walls and teleporting all over the fucking place. Assuming you even find a server in which all the players there ping less than 200 to you (if they have more than 200 ping they're invulnerable to you, but most of the time you aren't to them), chances are you'll be able to corner a player and unload all your SMG mags on them without them dying, and then they'll just knife you because your 180 9mm bullets to the head were getting annoying. Projectiles like grenades and rockets sometimes just magically dissapear, and if someone's moving, don't even fucking bother - you will NEVER hit them, even if they're moving straight towards you.

Then, when you thought gunz couldn't get anymore fucking worse, there's new innovations of shittyness. For example, the melee weapons are absolutely fucking hopeless unless you're using their knockdown attack, in which case your opponent is pretty much fucked unless he's able to hit spacebar about a trillion times. And that assumes you actually fucking 'hit' him - 9/10 times you knockdown somebody, the server will simply just not bother to register your hit at all.

Story: Like with all MMO games, there's no fucking story at all. I guess it's just shit stolen from gay-ass anime shit like Dragonball Z, so these morons are fighting for ways to "increase their power". Too bad nobody tells them that no matter how much power they get, they'll never be powerful enough to end up in a decent fucking game.

Score: I was thinking of 0/10, but that was too nice to this game. So I give it -7/10, with an added -120 for being a fucking MMO game.