HOLY SHIT. This game is so damn fun my tits exploded milk and everyone started drinking it because they like milk from my tits those sick fuckers. Anyway this game is great
Graphics: The graphics are just plain SEXEH. High polygon models with great ass skins all while displaying 10-20 guys on screen at once can only equal pure buttsex0r action. All the enemies, every single one of them looks damn good, and there is so many different looking enemies. If you put someones penis through a grinder and counted all the little chunks, thats how many different enemies there would be in this game. Also some of them are HUGE like serious sam, such as the first boss the necrogiant. THE BITCH TRIED TO FUCK ME UP. I fucking shoved a stake in his ass then blew him up with my awesome super powers. That cunt. All the weapons look great too and the enviorments are fucking great too. Not big fields like serious sam, instead we had some people who decided not to suck dick and swallows loads of cum when making a game (COUGH ION STORM COUGH). There is huge massively detailed enviorments with shit all over giving it tons of detail. Its great.
Sound: Ok everything in this game sounds fine, all the ambient sounds, weapon sounds, and enemy sounds. The one thing i finally noticed when playing this game is THE FUCKING MUSIC DOESNT SUCK FOR ONCE. Im sick of this pussy techno shit and/or lack of music in this game. Here they dont take shit and made a kick ass sound track all in mp3 format so i dont have to bitch around with converting them. The music kicks ass.
Gameplay: Its Basically serious sam. You just shoot the shit out of everything you see and then go to the next waypoint. Its fucking great. Espically all the weapons kick ass. A spinning blade that chops the shit out of anything. The good ol double barrel shotgun with freeze and everyones favorite the STAKE GUN. Mix this shit up with havok physics and you have pure sex0r. BLowing a stake into an enemy and send his bitch ass flying into a wall so he is hanging there. FInally a damn game that doesnt use the Havok physics engine like shit (Max Payne 2). IT actually adds shit to the damn game. Such as with the third boss who has a hammer, he smashes all this temple shit and takes a hammer and it all goes flying up. Its so fucking great.
Story: Lucifer is being a little bitch whore and is trying to conquer heaven. Of course god is going to be lazy and send someone else to do all the killing. So basically you run aorund killing hell's demons then you kill lucifer game is over HUZZAH.
The game knocks the shit out of my ass 9.5/10
"Painkiller - Black Tarot Card Guide" -M0nKeY
